Today is International Mud Day and we have had some great celebrations and activities here at school today. I thought it would be good to follow the mud theme, and it reminded me of something I read recently.

A few weeks ago, I mentioned a book I had been reading called “Make Your Bed” by Admiral William H. McRaven. I am up to my third time through that book now. It’s not long, but very helpful. Another lesson that Admiral McRaven learned in his Navy Seal training came during an exercise where the recruits were required to do activities in a big mudhole. They did running relays and the like while they were up to their waists in the mud. At the end of the activities, they were told that they would have to spend the night sitting in the mud.

During the night, officers would come over and say to them that if just five men would give up and leave the course, all of the others could get out, and go and enjoy hot chicken soup by the fire.  In the middle of the test, some of them seemed ready to give up. Then one man began to sing. One by one the others followed him. Suddenly the mud felt less cold, and the dawn closer. McRaven wrote, “Once again, we had learned an important lesson: the power of one person to unite the group, the power of one person to inspire those around him, to give them hope.” (McRaven, 2017)

In his original speech (which you can see on YouTube), he said, “If I have learned anything in my time traveling the world, it is the power of hope.” I am learning that of all of the motivations available to us, hope is one of the greatest there is . . . and if it is so important, we should be teaching our children about it, and how they can have it.

I like this definition of hope, “Hope is the belief that circumstances will get better. It’s not a wish for things to get better — it’s the actual belief, the knowledge that things will get better, no matter how big or small.” (Psychology Today) This is an important trait and habit for our children to develop. In fact, renowned research psychologist Martin Seligman found that kids who were more hopeful, actually had improved learning in school (1993). The following excerpt specifically addresses the idea of developing hope in our children and how we can do that.

“First, remember, your child watches you.

Do you have a sense of hope when you approach obstacles or do you give up easily? Take a personal inventory of your own behavior. When you are facing difficulty, talk it out with your child. Tell yourself, “I can do this. It will be ok. I just need to find a solution.” Let your child hear your thought process.

Read to your child.

Many children’s books have messages of hope. Talk to them about their favourite hero or heroine. Ask them what they like about the characters. Describe how that character shows hope and determination. . . Avoid books or media that only provide violence as a way to solve problems. Rather, reinforce characters that think through their options and find other solutions to their problems.

Teach your children how to stop and think.

Role-play difficult situations or conversations ahead of time. Problem-solve different responses and choices. Reward your child for role-playing with you, as well as trying different responses. Ask them how their efforts worked. Teach them you are on their side, and you will figure things out together.” (Anderson, 2013)

Hope is also a really important part of the Bible. 1 Corinthians 13 includes it right beside Faith and Love as a key principle of Christian belief and practice. “In this life we have three great lasting qualities—faith, hope and love.” 1 Cor 13:13.

Have a great week building hope with your kids,

Mark B